CHAPTER 3

 I stood up slowly and tip toed my way to the door . I slowly unlocked the door. I was shocked to see m7amed. My eyes have jumped out of their sockets. My heart started to beat and the tears of joy start to escape .

Me : m7amed 

I said while running to him to give him a tight hug . I pulled myself away from his warm hug and I looked deeply through his gorgeous eyes that always makes my heart melt. a tear escaped my eyes . god m7amed It's been a long time .

M7amed : I missed u Lujain.

Me : I miss you too

all of a sudden

... : lujaaain lujaaain

A voice called out my name and I quickly woke up from fear. I placed my hand on my chest to find my heart beating fast. I started breathing heavily.

Me : shi9ayir 

I worried 

Rakan : kint ga3id wala faj2a Asm3ich itnaden m7amed. 5ara3tene chan aga3dich

I just realized that all of this was a dream m7amed never showed up at the doorstep . I never got that warm hug from him . I never got the chance to look at his gorgeous eyes and tell him that I miss him. it was such a disappointment.

Me : mo nayma Amis wa kil ma I don't get enough sleep I say weird stuff while sleeping *chuckle*

I chuckled to loosen out the mood . Rakan looked unconvinced with my answer.

Rakan : wa laish mo nayma !?

Me : madre ma kan fene il noom.

Rakan : or 

Me : or ... ?

Rakan : you are worrying too much .

Me : ummm...la2 9adgine I'm ok ... Il mohim wain binro7 ??

Rakan : mara7 itbadlen

He asked and I noticed that I was still in my pyjs. 

Me : *blushing* la2 embala be right back .

I quickly grabbed a long light pink dress that reached to my knee and I wore my pistachio flats with them . Along with my lv cross bag. I then brushed my Long  hair and wore a band . Then applied  lipstick with a bit of eyeliner. Rakan doesn't allow me to put a lot + I don't like applying a lot of makeup . Natural beauty is always the best right :) ? *high five * 

As I was about to unlock the door  I overheard Rakan speaking to his friend over the phone .

Rakan : ya m3awad madre shfeha hathe ... Kil ma aba6il ma3aha maw'9oo3 il i3yal wayiha yin9ifig 

Shit he noticedddd

Rakan : Shakilha matabe a9lan wa madre shasawe ma3aha...

Rakan : eee it9adig lay yomik wa Ana Nadim bss shinsawe 5alha 3ala Allah.

What theeeee ??? what does he mean ???  

I opened the door quickly and went out .

Rakan : Yallah akalmik ba3dain ... Bye 

Rakan : jahza

Me : eee

I replied coldly. 

Rakan : Yallah nanzil 

He said as he opened the door for me . I walked towards the elevator without waiting for him. And I stomped my leg impatiently waiting for the elevator to arrive. The elevator opened and Rakan followed me in .

Silence filled every inch of the elevator. Until the elevator finally opened and we made our way out.

Rakan : taben tirayigain ?

Me : la2 mo mishtahya

I replied while looking at my phone. 

Rakan : 3ayal laish nazlen ?

Me : mo gilt tabe ti6la3 

Rakan : eee Ana 3inde Cham sha'3la lazim asaweha ba3dain ni6la3

Me : ok 3ayal an6irik foog

Rakan : Ok ... 5alay telephonich mafto7 3ashan a6aman 3alaich

Me : inshallah

I said as I got in the elevator again and went back to the room . I sat down on the bed thinking of the earlier phone call Rakan had with his friend. 

Rakan seems to be annoyed about the fact that I'm not ready to bring kids but I just don't want to rush with things. My heart still has feelings for m7amed and I don't think bringing a kid would solve all of this instead it would make things worse+ Rakan seems to regret marrying me . Jad everything  is upside down and I don't know what to do might as well cry . And yes I started crying and the tears ruined my make up and I stayed crying for half an hour until I got tired and I decided to wash up and re apply my make up . I need to be strong ... God brought us to this world because he knows that we are strong enough to live.  I'm bulletproof and nothing can brake me . yes I might seem crazy when I talk to myself but its just a way to feel better . 

I started thinking for solutions for this problem and one is to act happy  so things won't get worst and at least to show Rakan that I have a caring heart.

Ok now Lujain act happy ... forget about the problems forget about the pain . For the sake of ur life just pretend to be okay.

I sat down on the  bed and I started playing with my phone until Rakan finally showed up . 

Rakan : sorry ta25art 3alaich

Me : la2 3ade 

Say something nice lujain

Me : ... 7abeby

I continued .

Rakan : Yallah ni6la3 

Me : Yallah

We walked out the door together and I waited for Rakan this time . I decided to hold rakan's hand and show him some love . Rakan looked down at our hands then shifted his eyes towards me and said 

Rakan : a7ibich

Me : wa Ana akthar 

we made our way out of the hotel and rode the taxi to take us to " le garden ce  butterflies"

My French is bad mashaw .

and after several minutes we finally arrived and made our way in . The view was breath taking . I watched the butterflies fly all around the place . There were so many different colors and types of them . they looked amazing .

Rakan : excuse  me can you take a picture of us .

He asked the French guy .

Guy : yes 

He took the phone then Rakan suddenly pulled me into a hug . 

The guy took a picture then returned the phone to Rakan .

Rakan : shoofay 7ilwa ?

Me : eee wayed 

Rakan : ba7i6ha ib Instagram 

After that , Rakan excused himself and went to the bathroom . I was holding his phone . should I open it ?

My heart and mind were having a battle one said yes and the other no . After several seconds I unlocked the phone and went to Instagram . I saw the pic and found many likes . And one of the people who liked the pic was m7amed ... My heart started to accelerate . I opened his profile to find a picture of him and a pretty short women who had long ombre hair and that perfect curvy body . She was flawless . I guess that this was his wife. he seemed happy in the picture ... He seemed that he had moved on . Did he forget me ? Did he forget the memories ? All the good times ? Did he ... ?

All of these questions kept running through my head . A sudden tear escaped my eye . All of a sudden I saw a shadow covering my phone . I turned around to notice Rakan staring at his phone ? Then looking back at me .

Me : Rakan ugh ... I can explain .

--------------------------------

adre wallah il mafro'9 Amis I post bss wallah inmisa7 the chapter wa i6arait I re type it . Sorry for the delay again and ur feedbacks would make my day . So tell me what u think